From our friends at Menshealth.com
1. “IT’S CARL’S BIRTHDAY! LET’S ALL SING HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO CARL!”
2. “LET ME CIRCLE BACK TO YOU ON THAT.”
3. “HR CAN HELP WITH THAT.”
4. “I WAS SOOO SICK LAST NIGHT, I COULDN’T STOP THROWING UP.”
Then why are you in the office today infecting everyone else?
5. “WE’VE HIRED SOME CONSULTANTS.”
6. “CALL THE HELP DESK.”
Nothing good can ever come from a process that first involves your being issued a ticket.
7. “THE PRINTER IS JAMMED.”
When has the printer not been jammed?
8. “LET’S THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX ON THIS ONE.”
9. “WE NEED TO STREAMLINE THE PROCESS.”
10. “MY AIDEN SCORED TWO SOCCER GOALS THIS WEEKEND! WANT TO SEE THE VIDEO?”
11. “THIS IS A NEW PARADIGM. A REAL SEA-CHANGE.”
12. “LET’S LOOK AT THE METRICS.”
13. “LET’S HIT THE GROUND RUNNING ON THIS.”